April 2008
16 posts
Don't Drink the Water
Sooo, it turns out the water bottles I’ve been using since I was 14 are slowing killing me because they release some kinda something that gives you cancer. Great. The worst part is, it releases a shitload more bad stuff when you put hot water in there, so all those times I thought I was gettin’ healthy by chugging antioxidents in my tea I was actually chugging Earl Cancer. Not that...
Phew
It’s been a hopin’ week. I turned 24 on Wednesday, I’m pretty much done with school, I bought a new shower curtain. In short, I haven’t had time to sit down! For my birfday, Bryan took me out to Real Seafood with Ludi and Vesela. Ludi happens to have the same birthday as me, so we received mad $avings. The following day we had an official birthday party at Arbor...
Hart Broken, the Latest Craze
Bryan: http://youtube.com/watch?v=A9p0Ac5bLlI&feature=related
Doug: rick roll?
Doug: haha
Doug: jerk
Doug: corey hart roll
Bryan: no man
Bryan: even better
Bryan: you just got…
Bryan: hart broken
Doug: get out.
NATHAN!
I don’t know what in the hell Nathan wants from me. I told that leech that I’d be busy for the next few weeks and that I couldn’t update every five minutes, but what does this guy do? Calls me at 1am and to tell me to update more, and to try to work his name into it more. Well, that guy is a jerk.
DOUGGLES IN THE D!
Me: APRIL IN THE D!
Me: APRIL IN THE D!
Doug: yes?
Me: APRIL IN THE D!
Me: APRIL IN THE D!
Me: APRIL IN THE D!
Me: APRIL!
Me: IN!
Me: THE!
Me: D!
Me: APRIL!
Doug: in
Me: THE D!
Doug: w00
April IN THE D!
I’m not sure why, but FSN has decided to start a new sports marketing campaign advertising the Tigers…or hockey playoffs, hmm or Detroit? Anyway, it’s called April in the D, and it involves some really annoying dude screaming APRIL IN THE D! APRIL IN THE D! at each commercial break. Obviosly, these commericals are hilarious to me, but not so much for Doug. I almost got my ass...
It's like purgatory, but you get a certificate at...
I forgot to officially tell all my avid fans (my mom and Nathan) that I was recently admitted to the PhD program in bioinformatics at the University of Michigan. So, thank god, I won’t have to become a real person anytime soon. Everyone is, of course, welcome to buy me things because even though I get paid to be here, I’m still technically a “poor college student.”
Dear Jesus, please spare my kidneys.
Me: I used to like coke better, but now I'm a firm pepsi believer
Kelly: and to what do you attribute this change in preference?
Me: I dunno man, probably being born again
Kelly: sure
Kelly the bible was wrong when it said men could be born twice
Kelly: turns out birth of the water and birth of the spirit are just practices for birth of the cola wars
So, no bacon then?
Me: so my mom mentioned us all living on a spinster commune again the other day
Me: ...so that's still on
Kelly: you and me and her?
Me: yeah
Kelly: well, maybe she and i can do it
Kelly: she's a nurse, i've been farming for a year and a half
Kelly: you're a scientist, no skills.
Me: I can...
Me: make the bacon?
Kelly: well do you know HOW to do that?
Kelly: do you have references?
Dang!
Dang! Imma be a master of science real soon, so think of questions about SCIENCE to ask next time you see me. Don’t expect mucho-posto for the next two weeks (Nathan) because Imma be so busy with finishing up this god awful semester. When should have graduation party?